Dog Breath
by Confiscated Retina
Summary: Jade and Terezi talk about boys, the definition of ears, and low grade processed meat products.


**A/N:** I saw some really cute Jade x Terezi art on tumblr and couldn't resist the fluff. Given the latest updates, this is pretty much just AU cuteness, so all aboard the good ship Jadezi! :D

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**Dog Breath**

They sat side by side atop a rust-colored henge, neither taking notice of the uneven stone beneath their clothing. Terezi's crimson scarf ends dangled over the other side of her stone perch while Jade kicked her red-shoed feet in the air.

"Dave's a jerk," she said into the stillness, white-furred ears flipping back. "Er, well, maybe just alpha D...no! Any Dave is lousy!"

"Is this because dead bird future Dave broke up with you two years ago or whatever?" Terezi tapped her yellow-nailed fingers on the cool stone between them.

"No! I said I was past that," Jade winced at the sulkiness even she could hear in her own voice.

"Mm-hmm," the troll's mouth quirked up in a slight smile.

"Fine, all-knowing brain seer, maybe I'm not past Davesprite and his stupid attitudes! Regular Dave is still just as much of a jerk."

"What'd he do this time?"

"We were talking and he...he just...ugh! This is so stupid!"

The Witch of Space put her face in her hands and let out a low, frustrated, and very canine growl. Terezi snickered.

"Oh, don't you start, too!" Jade glared at her.

"Hey, don't get your tail in a secure loop," the troll was still smiling. "It's just kind of cute and funny when you do those Earth barkbeast things."

Jade blinked. "...'Cute'?"

Terezi turned her face away. "Yeah. Cute."

Silence descended between them. Terezi began idly kicking her feet while Jade stilled, staring at her hands in her lap. A faint blush colored her cheeks as a dull breeze sifted through her long black hair.

"Boys are stupid," she muttered in a vague attempt to recapture the thread of their conversation.

"You got that right," Terezi's toes curled in her shoes, cracking purple nail polish hidden by the vivid red material.

"I wanted to just forget about stupid Dave and all his stupid selves today but I can still feel exactly where he is in the universe at all times. This sucks!"

"Maybe you just need a distraction. Can I touch your nubby weird horn things?"

"Touch my what?!" Jade jerked back.

"Your horn whatsits," Terezi put her hands by her own horns and mimed Jade's canine ears with her swiveling fingers.

"Oh, my ears?" Jade touched one with her own hand, relaxing.

"Yeah, those," Terezi leaned forward. "What are ears?"

"These are ears," the white-furred appendages twitched. "I hear with them. Don't you have ears?"

"Pfft, no. Trolls have a semi-internal auditory sponge on either side of the skull. Are those weird flesh flaps on all the other humans' heads ears, too?"

"Uh-huh."

"Humans are weird. I always wanted to pull one off somebody to see what they were, but I guess I won't now. So...can I touch your ears, Jade?"

Jade clapped her hands over the parts in discussion. "Not if you're going to pull them off!"

"I already said I wouldn't, jeeze! Yours look like they actually do something, at least," Terezi's hands were partially lifted, fingers twitching restlessly.

Jade hesitantly lowered her hands. "Okay, you can touch them I guess."

Terezi's fingers brushed over Jade's white, velvety ears. One ear shivered and twitched away at the troll's cautious touch.

"Haha, that's so weird," she lightly caressed the ear again.

Jade squirmed. "Stop it, that tickles!"

"Which means...?" Terezi gently squeezed an ear between her fingers and thumb, smoothing the light fuzz with an upward stroke.

"Um...skin crawlies, kind of?" Jade skittered her blunt claws over Terezi's arm.

"Yeeg!" the troll snatched her hand away, rubbing at the spot and grinning.

"Yeah, that."

The two girls grinned at each other for a moment until the troll's hands drifted back to Jade's ears. She patted the black hair between them with an absent-minded smile.

"Your hair doesn't feel any different from a troll's," she mused.

"Really? Did you think it would?"

"Yeah, kind of. You and Egbert have decent-looking hair, but Rose and that other jerk have such an unnatural color. Here, look."

Terezi grabbed one of Jade's hands and placed it firmly on top of her own head. Claw-tipped fingers sifted through the black strands before sliding over one of the troll's smooth, sharp horns.

""Um..." a faint turquoise tinge came to Terezi's cheeks and Jade's hand froze.

"Er, am I not supposed to touch those?"

"Oh, uh, well... You can, I don't mind," Terezi's smile was small and shy. "It's just...kind of personal."

One finger slid down Terezi's horn to it's base, hidden in fluffy tangled hair. "Does this have anything to do with me being 'cute'?"

"...Maybe," Terezi was idly stroking both of Jade's ears as the other girl leaned closer.

"Well..." she couldn't quite look the troll in the face, but a smile curved Jade's lips nonetheless. "I kind of think you're cute, too."

Jade's free hand carefully wandered toward Terezi's other horn as their faces drew closer. The troll's fingers tangled in her hair just before their lips met.

"You taste kind of like low grade, processed meat products," Terezi said when they parted.

"Oh," Jade's ears wilted.

"I like it." the troll's smile was genuine.

"Uh...thanks?" despite her uncertain tone, a hopeful glimmer sparked in Jade's eyes. "Davesprite always complained about my snausage breath."

"Well he's already been established as a tasteless loser, so who cares what he said. It kind of reminds me of minced hoofbeast back home," a look of distant nostalgia crossed Terezi's face.

"That's good, right?" Jade's smile was shy.

"Yeah, it is."

The troll gently pulled her forward for a second kiss, this one longer. When they parted, Terezi grinned.

"Also, Dave is a nook sniffing load gaper stain for complaining about your barkbeast breath and you so were not interrupting his concentration on yet another shitty rap."

"How did you...?" Terezi tapped her forehead. "Oh, right. Seer of mind."

They settled back on the stone, hands touching, feet dangling idly in the air.

"So..." Terezi broke the brief silence. "Do you have any low grade processed meat products you'd be willing to share? I'm kind of hungry for some now."

"Sure," Jade smiled. "There's practically an endless supply in a bunch of abandoned stores and factories on Earth. Want to go get some?"

"Fuck yes."

The two girls vanished in a halo of radioactive green.

Moments later, the sound of footfalls in grass disturbed the ancient silence that had barely begun to wrap itself around the abandoned henge. Jake English ambled between the supporting stone pillars and paused, sniffing the air.

"Huh," he mused before continuing on his way. "Smells like dog biscuits."

**END.**


End file.
